The TurboTax mobile app is definitive proof that there’s such a thing as too much portability. There are homeless guys who spend their days ranting on street corners about the apocalypse who have more sense than to do their taxes on a phone.
Anyone else find it confusing and creepy that all of the hottest porn on Tumblr is collected by underage teenage girls? Where were these girls when I was sixteen?
Thanks to the internet, they may as well start calling television news “Old News.” I can’t remember the last time I saw a story of the evening news that hadn’t crossed my feed reader hours or days earlier.
There are times that it’s all I can do not to explain to real life people, “I’m so much cooler online.”
When she turned to me and said “I want my book to have their own shelves,” that was when I knew moving in together would be the right thing for us.
The recent proliferation of video chat has assured that there will always be at least one clean spot in my house: the spot right behind where I sit at the computer. Thanks internet for making me a better housekeeper.
Opening a new tab and forgetting which website you were about to type into the address bar is the new walking into a room and forgetting why. It takes less energy and it isn’t quite as embarrassing to do in front of other people, though, so I guess that’s progress.
The challenge for a human now is to be more interesting to another than his or her smartphone. Thanks to mobile apps, dating is a bitch of an uphill battle if you’re not the one with breasts in the relationship.
There’s not a year that goes by where I don’t thank God for my college education. Without all that practice knocking out term papers the morning they were due, I’m not sure how I’d ever get my taxes done.